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Thread: April 2014 Entry - Hell: The Eternal Soul Grinder

  1. #21
      Slylok is offline
    Guild Adept Slylok's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Midgardsormr View Post
    You have "who's sole purpose," which should be "whose sole purpose." Who's is a conjunction meaning "who is," which precludes the use of the apostrophe when turning who into a possessive. Receive is misspelled as recieve (a misspelling that jkat ironically repeated). I didn't see any other errors, unless they refer to the lack of punctuation, which I took to be a stylistic choice.

    I love the demonic parody of the Universal Man.
    Ah ok. I can't believe I missed that actually, lol. Glad you like the universal/vitruvian demon.
    Our sense of the stability of the earth is an illusion due to the shortness of our lives.
    - Neil deGrasse Tyson


  2. #22
    Guild Master Gracious Donor Midgardsormr's Avatar
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    It's difficult to proof your own work, unless you're doing it months after you initially wrote something. It's too easy to see what you expected to see instead of what's actually there.
    Bryan Ray, visual effects artist
    http://www.bryanray.name

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