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Thread: Fjorheim - Back to mapping again

  1. #11
      GrimFinger is offline
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    Your mountains are a mixture of portend and pretense, and you are a cursed man for it.

    They portend a greatness yet to be seen. The color and texture of your mountains make one salivate at the prospects, at the thought of what might be possible. But, they pretend to be only a shell of their possible selves.

    Scale is your enemy, and it is eating you alive in this one, even as color is your true friend and ally, and it won't allow you to die. The green of the land whets the appetite, and the path/road wears its ghostly hue well.

    What is the whitish blob? Ack! It is not a goof it, whatever it is. It does not blend in with the countryside well.

    The text of Fjorheim is impeccable. A pity it obscures that which it denotes. Perhaps smaller is greater, here. The font, itself, fits the mountain work fine, though.

    The trees and the structures should be reduced in size, I think, to cause those mountains to swell in size, by comparison. All those cartographic clumps of rockwork, and nary a foreboding stone amongst them. For pity, for shame.

    You wield a stout pen, when it comes to raising mountains, but you can barely plant a seedling, it seems. Forests are not your strong point, it seems.

    I keep coming back to the land, itself, as I scour this map. Such a beautiful lady adorned in cartographic sackcloth. The land, itself, is beautiful. The countless lines imbue the land with a texture of its very own. The mountains share the same bloodline as the land. Skill. Talent. Yet, you dare not unleash yourself, it seems. Why?

    And what is that which lies in the valleys of those mountains? Water? Snow? Ice? Green sand? What manner of madness is this? What lives in those valleys, and why have you chosen to waste them?

    The water is green, as well, it seems. I remain unsure in what I think of this. If you turn it blue, it may destroy it. The texture of it, however - Wow! Just wow! You seem to have mastered the hardest skills, while remaining untested in the least challenging aspects of cartography.

    I can't draw a stick man, but you possess the skills and talents to draw the Mona Lisa in cartographic form.

    The dotted lines are a blight. There's far too many dots in those dotted paths to places adorned with a lack of imagination in constructed form. Those structures don't look ugly, mind you, but something about them seems to just be lacking. Maybe it's the fact that there's not enough of them, or the fact that they lend to the tortured scaling that assails this land.

    The zigzag in the northwest of the land, that darts to and from tree to tree, is a distraction of an unsavory sort. It doesn't blend well, and it continues its cartographic abomination through the lands of the southwest of the map. What, exactly and specifically, is that supposed to be, anyway? In any event, it is amiss.
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  2. #12
      Lalaithion is offline
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    I agree that the trees are a bit big; also, they look like they are floating, so I would make the trees cast a shadow. Also, the river-like thing doesn't look much like a river. (Is it a river? Did I look at it wrong?)
    This cavern is below all, and is the foe of all. It is hatred, without exception. This cavern knows no philosophers; its dagger has never cut a pen. Its blackness has no connection with the sublime blackness of the inkstand. Never have the fingers of night which contract beneath this stifling ceiling, turned the leaves of a book nor unfolded a newspaper.

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