Hiya Helleaven! Honestly, I don't think the map you drew is bad at all! While I wish you the best of luck in finding a taker for your request, I'd also like to urge you very strongly to find a tutorial for a style you like and give it a shot! That way if you need changes you can, or you can do the map for your next book in the same style. As a fellow writer, I've found that drawing a new map can be very inspiring for my writing, and vice versa.