"You can't do that... It's freaking me out!" (South on top)

We have plenty of accurate representations - most classrooms that have a Mercator wall map probably also have a globe, and you can't get much more accurate than that. Aside from the tongue in cheek cartographers for social equality, Mercator *is* a mediocre reference map. Personally I don't much like Peters as a wall map either - I care about shape too. One of the interrupted projections where shape is compromised a little, size a little, direction a little, and distance a little probably works better.

Unless you want to just unashamedly use the King Of Siam projection, where the place you live is hugely big and important and everything else is midgetized ;-)...